Last night, as I wrote my last journal entry of my Summer 2008 journal, I realized how my life is taking form. Roughly a year ago, a friend of mine wrote a song titled, "Path of Faith." An amazing song, I encourage all to listen to. But the song's lyrics tell of how Jesus clears a path for us, but we as humans are weak and we listen to the call of sin. It saddens Jesus...as the lyrics state
"He cries to watch me suffering
And bleeds to wipe away that sin
Wipe away my sin"
The song ends with this person hopping back on the path and continuing to follow Jesus; keeping in mind not to look back. Such a powerful song, that leaves me feeling convicted and sad. I hate that I have hurt Jesus so much in the past and still continue to do so. But ever since I first heard this song, my mind has continued to go back to the imagery of life as a path led by God. Last night, I branched off from the song's initial impact on me and personalized it.
We all go through moments/stages/times in our lives where we think...ok God it's in your hands, but why here? How can these dark places lead me to a brighter day. But while we focus on the dark scenery, we fail to think about all the sinful dead ends we traveled to..we thought we could journey on by ourselves. When we have it in "our hands" we dont travel too far. The road gets dark, bumpy, and lonely. But somehow God looks for us on these dead ends...He usually knows the popular routes people take, He finds us as we are sitting at the dead end. We are probably cold, crying, and ashamed that we took it on our own hands and ventured off. But God says something of this nature, "My child, dont be silly, I am here, we will leave this place, get you cleaned up and find that happiness again. You must be patient and trust me." Then, we turn around and find the road we are supposed to be on...I call this one main street. But even on our journey to main street, with God beside us, we begin to loose faith. God takes us on shortcuts that still look gray, they have brush on the road, and there aren't many travelers. I finally look to God and say, "Lord, where are we going? Dont all roads that lead to main street look somewhat like main street?" And God tells me," Relax Kristy, Be patient, remember how far away you were? Just trust me, I have you! I know the way, I created it.
Lately, I have been walking this path, and I see that it does resemble goodness. I can see how it will end up on main street, but some of these shortcuts are scary. Our time to do the Lord's work is limited, He must use shortcuts to get us back on the right track... we waste so much time. I know the Lord will not let me down...He will show me the way...and when I get to main street (the one that goes straight to Heaven), I will be so happy. I was reading some passages out of Psalms during my quiet time that gave me so much hope...."Those who hate the Lord would cringe before him, and their punishment would last forever. But you would be fed with the finest of wheat; with honey from the rock I would satisfy you." Psalm 81:15-16 God will satisfy me...a task so giant. Humans are rarly satisfied.
God is blessing me and will show me the purpose for traveling down undesirable shortcuts. And when I get to main street, I cannot wait to tell people of my journey.